Stop Over-Explaining

We only get so much energy in a day. Yet, so often, we waste it trying to convince people to see things the way we do. We explain. Then, we over-explain. Then we find ourselves exhausted, frustrated, and hurt when they still don’t get it…or worse, when they don’t want to.

Even if what you’re saying is backed by Scripture, truth, facts, or science… some people simply don’t want to see things differently. Why? Because their narrative serves them. It makes sense to them-even if it doesn’t actually make sense. And no amount of talking in circles will change that.

Look at Jesus.

When He walked this earth, He was the perfect example of what it means to be human. He spoke truth-absolute truth- without chasing people down to convince them.

Think about the story of the rich young ruler. The man asked Jesus, “What must I do to inherit eternal life?” Jesus told him plainly: sell your possessions and follow Me. The man walked away sad, unwilling to hear what he didn’t want to hear. What’s striking is what Jesus didn’t do. He didn’t run after him. He didn’t plead, reason, or remind him of how life-changing obedience would be. He let him walk away.

Or consider Judas at the Last Supper. Jesus tells the disciples one of them will betray Him. Judas says, “Surely not I, Lord?” And Jesus simply responds, “Yes, it is you.” He doesn’t roll out a scroll of proof. He doesn’t argue His case or beg Judas to reconsider. He doesn’t remind Judas of what a good friend he has been to him. He lets Judas be Judas.

That’s wisdom. That’s power. That’s a boundary.

And I think that’s a lesson for us.

We don’t need to spend our precious energy trying to make people see what they don’t want to see. We don’t need to run ourselves ragged trying to force someone into truth. Sometimes the most Christlike thing we can do is simply state the truth, and then let people choose.

If this resonates with you, maybe it’s time to look at where in your life you’re spinning your wheels. Where are you over-explaining? Where are you trying to control someone else’s understanding at the expense of your peace?

You have permission to stop.

You have permission to set a kind, firm boundary.

You have permission to let people be who they are, and still protect your heart in the process.

Because your energy is too valuable to waste.